Farming Teaches Us to Adapt, So Why Is It So Hard to Adapt Ourselves?
Seasons change. Markets rise and fall. Machinery breaks down at exactly the wrong time. Staff leave, plans change and the weather rarely does what we want it to do. Farming requires us to constantly reassess, problem-solve and find another way forward.
Yet when the change is within us, adapting can feel much harder.
Receiving a mental health diagnosis, living with an injury, developing a disability or managing a chronic illness can change the way we live and work. Suddenly, the person who has always been capable and independent may find that some things are harder than they used to be. For people in agriculture, this can have a significant impact on mental wellbeing.
Farming is often more than a job. It is closely connected to identity, family, community and a sense of purpose. Many farmers measure their contribution by their ability to work hard, solve problems and be there when others need them.
When our capacity changes, it can leave us asking difficult questions. Am I still pulling my weight? What if I cannot do what I used to do? Will other people have to pick up the slack? Where do I fit now?
There can be real grief in recognising that life may look different. Frustration, anger, sadness and fear about the future are common. Some people withdraw from others, while others respond by pushing themselves even harder, determined to prove that nothing has changed.
But adapting does not mean giving up.
We adapt our farming businesses all the time. If something is no longer working, we look for another way. We change systems, invest in new technology, bring in extra help or rethink how a job gets done.
Perhaps we need to give ourselves permission to do the same.
Adapting to a change in mental or physical health might mean working different hours, stepping back from particular tasks, accepting help or finding new ways to contribute to the farm. It might also mean prioritising sleep, making time for medical appointments, seeking professional mental health support or being more open with family about how you are really travelling.
These changes can be difficult, particularly when independence has always been important to you. But changing how you do something does not make your contribution less valuable. Years of farming build knowledge, experience and skills that cannot be measured by how many hours you work or how many physical jobs you complete in a day. Your role may change, but your value within your family, business and community remains.
Perhaps the question is not, "How do I get back to the person I was before?" A better question might be, "How can I adapt to the person I am today?"
Farming has always required resilience, flexibility and the ability to find another way forward. Sometimes we need to offer ourselves the same opportunity to adapt that we give our farms.
Sarah Crosthwaite – Open Road Counselling
